Get Him Out of Your System Part 2

Friends

I do suggest talking to some friends about the situation. Let all those feels out. The only thing is that I suggest talking to friends that actually care about you. Sure we all have those friends that we hangout with, but are not sure why we actually hangout with them, and then we have those friends that not matter what they will be there for you. Those are the friends you need to talk to. The ones that will just sit there and let you vent about the situation, will give you sound advice, and are willing to help you get on with your life. I unfortunately only have two of those friends, one is a girl who had been in the same situation and the other is a gay male (I personally advice every woman should have a gay friend, they are honest, real, and so much fun). 

When talking to them, get it all out of your system, even take a night/ sleep over to talk about it. And once you are finished talking about it with them, never talk about it every again. Although they may be willing to listen to you anytime, they will get sick of hearing about your relationship problems. Plus, no one wants to be around a Debbi Downer. So vent once with you friends and never speak of it again.

Music
"When words fail, music speaks." ~ Hans Christian Anderson
"Music expresses that which cannot be said and on which is impossible to be silent." ~ Victor Hugo

Besides for retail therapy, music is the best therapy (and a lot cheaper). Music have all the words that you want to say, but for some reason you can never come up with them. Like poetry and other forms of art, music can be interpreted differently to every person. For me it is all about how the song makes me feel. From the lyrics, the mood of the song, and the tune, it all gets to me. Sometimes I come to tears, other songs just make me extremely mad. When my relationship ended I listened to the heartbroken music played on the radio, then I made a playlist on my computer to play in my room, then I made a playlist for my mp3 for when I run or sitting on the metro. I listened to it no stop, for about seven months.
For those months I cried, screamed, punched walls, etc. and it all helped. Some songs I listened to until I stopped crying. Until I stop feeling the way I did about him. Until I realized the song that got me balling about him, no longer effected me. Until I had cried, screamed, and punched him all out of my system. Sounds crazy I know, but can't keep that emotion all in, had to get it out (and I am not one to let people see me cry). When it finally came to that point, when HE no longer effected me, I realized that I was almost over him, at least the really strong emotions. After that, I felt like I was finally on my way to get over him without any other emotional distractions.
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Here are a list of some of the songs on my 'Heart Broken" Playlist. These may help someone, and of you have any others, please feel free to add

Toni Braxton........................................................... How Could An Angel Break My Heart

Rihanna................................................................... Stupid In Love

La Roux................................................................. Cover My Eyes

Mya........................................................................ Best Of Me

Tynisha Keli............................................................ I Wished You Loved Me

Rosemary Clooney.................................................. Love Didn't Do Right By Me

Keri Hilson.............................................................. Energy

Aaliyah.................................................................... I Care 4 U

Lady Gaga ............................................................. Bad Romance

Rihanna................................................................... Photographs

Britney Spears......................................................... Lonely

Paramore................................................................ Emergency

Shakira................................................................... Objection Tango

La Roux.................................................................. Tiger Lily

Pink ........................................................................ Just Like a Pill

Alicia Keys.............................................................. Fallen

Dido........................................................................ White Flag

Karen White............................................................ Superwoman

Lykke Li.................................................................. Breaking It Up

Keri Hilson.............................................................. Where Did He Go

Rihanna................................................................... I'm Still Not Over You

Asia Cruz................................................................. Selfish

Paramore................................................................. Misery Business

Imogen Heap........................................................... Candelight

TLC........................................................................ Waterfalls

Jack Johnson........................................................... Sitting, Waiting, Wishing

Rihanna................................................................... Emergency Room

Dwight Yoakam....................................................... Fast As You

Frankie J.................................................................. Don't Wanna Try

Trey Songs............................................................... Can't Help But Wait

Cassie...................................................................... Sometimes

The Script................................................................ Break Even

Timberland............................................................... Say Something

Dawn Richardson..................................................... Tip Toe

Nikki Flores............................................................. Face In The Crowd

Ryan Leslie.............................................................. Addition

Beyonce................................................................... Scared of Lonely

La Roux................................................................... Armour Love

Toni Braxton............................................................ Hands Tied

Ingrid Michaelson..................................................... Starting Now

Pink......................................................................... Sober

Aaliyah..................................................................... The One I gave My Heart To

Beyonce................................................................... Irreplaceable

Ryan Leslie............................................................... Used To Be

Babyface.................................................................. The Loneliness

Nelly Furtado............................................................ Mas

Black Eyed Peas....................................................... Missing You

Lady Gaga................................................................ Eh, Eh (Nothing Else I Can Say)

Missy Higgins............................................................ Where I Stood

Mario........................................................................ Break Up

Amy Winehouse........................................................ Back to Black

Kelly Clarkson.......................................................... Because of You

Pink.......................................................................... I Don't Believe You

Backstreet Boys........................................................ Don't Want You Back

Lily Allen................................................................... Little Things

Alicia Keys................................................................ Lesson Learned

Eminem...................................................................... 25 to Life

Black Eyed Eyes........................................................ Alive

Imogen Heap............................................................. Hide and Seek

Pink........................................................................... It's All Your Fault

Toni Braxton.............................................................. I Hate Love

LL Cool J.................................................................. I Need Love

Seal........................................................................... I've Been Loving You Too Long

Beyonce.................................................................... Broken-Hearted Girl

Jazmine Sullivan......................................................... Bust Your Windows

All-American Rejects................................................. Gives You Hell

Pink........................................................................... Who Knew

Lykke Li.................................................................... Little Bit

Meatloaf and Bonnie...................................................Total Eclipse of the Heart

Nikki Flores............................................................... Have What I Had

Nickelback................................................................ How You Remind Me

Dido.......................................................................... My Lovers Gone

Gorilla Joe................................................................. Echo

Shakira...................................................................... Did It Again

Rihanna...................................................................... Fire Bomb

Toni Braxton.............................................................. Yesterday

Backstreet Boys......................................................... Quit Playing Games With My Heart

Amanda Blank............................................................ Shame on Me

The Bridges................................................................ Pieces

Pink........................................................................... Long Way to Happy

Kiesha Cole............................................................... Shoulda Let You Go

Mateo......................................................................... Now That I Ain't Got You

Amy Winehouse.......................................................... You Sent Me Flying

Jesse McCartney........................................................ How Do You Sleep

Heather Headly............................................................ I Wish I Wasn't

The Cataracs............................................................... Julia

Dawn Richardson........................................................ Broken

Aaliyah....................................................................... Heart Broken

Lykke Li..................................................................... I'm Good, I'm Gone

The Pussy Cat Dolls..................................................... I Hate This Part

Mario.......................................................................... How Could You

Rihanna....................................................................... Rehab

Eminem........................................................................ Love the Way You Lie

Danity Kane................................................................ Damaged

Paramore.................................................................... Brick By Boring Brick

Shakira....................................................................... Underneath Your Clothes

Danity Kane................................................................ Poetry

Drake.......................................................................... Find Your Love

Kelly Clarkson............................................................. Never Again

Trey Songs.................................................................. Does He Do It

Jhene........................................................................... Stuck Like This

La Roux...................................................................... Bullet Proof

Rihanna....................................................................... Cry

Get Him Out of Your System Part 1

The easiest way to get someone out of your life is to erase their memory. Usually this includes taking everything that reminds you of them and throwing it in the trash.Personally I would prefer dramatically screaming out of my window tossing everything out, but I am against littering and the dramatics. I don't understand the point of getting rid of anything. People forget that the material items mean absolutely nothing compared to the memories. Think about it, attached to that item is a memory and lets say you keep that item in a special place in your room, so you get rid of the item, but every time you look at that empty spot, your going to think of what was there and then it leads to that memory all over again. So you are going to remember them regardless unless you are gonna throw away your brain (I don't recommend).

I suggest keeping everything. Why? because getting rid of it will lead to regret in some cases and in others why give them the satisfaction that they got all their stuff back. I have created some categories to figure out what to do with them.

Pictures
Pictures are always awkward and the only thing I can think of doing with them is keeping them in a box. Forget the photo albums, in a box is best. Do Not Burn or Throw Them Away!!! Why Not??? Because you never know when you might want to look back in your life. Sure that guy may be long gone, but still. And now we have the wonderful invention of FaceBook so you know they will be floating in cyberspace whether you un-tag them or not. One day you might look back at them and laugh and talk shit about the guy that fucked up your life for a moment and how you grew from it.

Facebook
I have grown to hate FaceBook. Sure it is nice to keep up with people from you past and stalk the people in your future, BUT our generation is too hung up on the social networking. This is one thing that I suggest you did get rid of/ altering. The downside of Facebook is the whole relationship status. Mine is currently set on NOTHING which is good. After me and the guy broke it off it went from "In a Relationship with..." to NOTHING. Don't let people see your status. They wait for the chance to go from "In a Relationship" to "Single." Everyone waits for that and people are so noisy they like to post comments on your wall like, "I am so sorry," or, "What happened?" LIKE ITS THEIR BUSINESS!!! So to eliminate these questions just set it to nothing. His can go to single, but your goes to nothing, why because nothing needs to be sad.

The other thing about facebook are those pictures that you have saved in your photo albums. I would keep those just because pictures are good. You never have to look at them again if you don't want to and believe it helps to keep them were they are. It shows that you are the stronger person and whether he is in your life or not, you had him once, and everyone will know it. When it comes to tagged pictures, keep them as well. There has to be a better story behind them besides the fact that he is in the picture as well.

Now... some may call it childish or stupid, but deleting someone or blocking them from facebook may help. I know I had to do this with my ex. Some may not have to, but because I didn't consider him as a friend let alone a boyfriend, I first deleted him from my friends. Then I just found myself looking at his page all the time and his fiancé's (yeah, LONG story), so then I had to block them both. This may not have to be the case with everyone, but I got hurt bad, really bad and cutting him off from facebook has helped me in ways you couldn't imagine. It took some will power to stop from going back and unblocking them, but I did it.

Numbers
When it comes to phone numbers I have two suggestions.The first is to keep them. Keep them so when they call you, you know who is calling and decide to either answer or ignore. The second would be to delete their numbers. Deleting the numbers gets them out of you phonebook so that when you scroll through it, you never have to see their name.
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This was the second to hardest thing for me to do. Ignoring the guy was easy. Staying in touch with his friends that I like, that was easy. But trying to forget him was hard. I still think about him time after time, but not as much as I used to and not with as much hate either. Like I said before, unless we can take out brains out, the memories are the biggest things to get over while the materials are just there in place of the person.

Introduction

I never thought I would ever be the girl to cry in the middle of the night thinking about everything that went wrong in my last relationship. But this past year I was that girl. I was the girl that converse with all her girlfriends about how sad I was and I didn't understand why I was acting like I was. I am the strong type of woman. The type that never shows she's hurt in public, the one that never cries, the one that all the other girls go to for some pick-me-up advise (or the advise that makes him look worst than he really is). But this one guy hurt me so bad that I was the girl that I swore I would never be.

The relationship was fucked up anyway, but still it was a long one and I guess the longer you are with someone, the longer its takes to realize that its fucked up. And the longer it takes for you to realize its fucked up the more it hurts. So its a lose-lose situation. But still, you never think that one person could hurt you so bad. And it took me a year, yes and entire year to get over this one guy. So you can say I had five fucked up years. And in the end it wasn't even worth it! He wasn't hot, he wasn't rich, he wasn't particularly good at anything (especially sex... thats a crime in itself), and he wasn't really that nice. Why the hell did I fall for him? I guess when you live in the moments the important things pass you by. 

That doesn't matter now because I have finally realized that I am so much better that he is. I am so much better without him than I am with him. I am so much better being the person that someone will learn to love and adore. I am the person that he missed out on. And I have realized all this over a course of a long, lonely year. So why start this blog? I'm not a writer by any means, my grammar isn't perfect, I can't spell, and I tend to ramble on a lot. But I felt like I had something to say. I don't particularly care if anyone reads this, but if they do I hope it helps. I figure I have had a year to learn all this, why not share someone it. 

So... How to get over a guy?